ITALO MOURA

When my daughter was born, I had grand aspirations. I thought, “I’ll provide her with opportunities I didn’t have. I’ll shape her into a decent human being, instilling values that will guide her throughout life.” It was a noble thought but easier said than done when nurturing values.
I raised my daughter with abundant love and attention, ensuring she never felt neglected. Every child craves attention, and my daughter was no different. I taught her kindness, generosity, and respect for others in her early stages. With these values combined, she faced the world, ready to share her love. However, how others treated her wasn’t always kind; she experienced bullying and unkindness, which made her question the significance of benevolence.
From an early age, I encouraged my daughter to be honest and always tell the truth, and I embedded in her the idea that truth-telling is the right thing to do. As she started growing up, she clung to this principle. While initially seemed impressive, it was only a short time before she encountered some issues. She would express everything she perceived, leading to trouble with adults who felt some things were better left unsaid. It was a harsh contrast to the world she knew, and it didn’t get any easier as she began socializing with other kids. Some would lie and even advocate dishonesty to get ahead in life. But, despite peer influence, she held onto my advice.
In this whirlwind of moral lessons, my daughter asked me, “Dad, which path is the right one to follow? Should one be like the child who tells the truth or lies to get ahead? Is it better to be like the child who shares toys and respects others or the child who believes they are smarter by not sharing, keeping everything to themselves, and bullying others for power?” Her question made me pause and think deeply. There isn’t a universal right or wrong way to raise a child. Each parent does what they believe is best for their child, influenced by their background experiences. We’re all different and should accept and respect everyone’s point of view.
But here was my advice to my daughter: “Hold onto your values, all the principles you believe to be true and right. Surround yourself with people with similar values; they will likely become your true friends and perhaps part of your extended family.”
For every parent and child trying to navigate these waters, do your best, surround yourself with those who reflect your values, and respect those who have different ones.